me: *does weird things when home alone*
me: I bet there's hidden cameras
rnax: rnax: me seductively whispering...
madeofmetals: So there’s only one channel in this motel, And this morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street. They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, “no mister noodle, your HANDS!” and all the tv kids would laugh. Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn’t find his hands, I heard a...
me when i try to work out :
how i would narrate the Olympics
me: they're doing some athletic shit
hazzalotofnips: i bet that when harry goes golfing he doesn’t actually golf, he just prances around the golf course singing “bet on it” at the top of his lungs
So in 2012, when each time zone changes to 12/21,...
janky17: now that you are sharing this with tumblr, only the tumblr people will be alive.
me: skips song by favorite band on ipod
me: *feels guilty*
me: *presses rewind*
me: ok no i'm sorry mommy's here
80 years from now;
Granddaughter: GRANDMA ARE YOU OKAY?
Me: //laughs// HELP I'VE FALLEN AND I CAN'T GET UP
Granddaughter: Grandma this isn't the time for your old 2000 jokes!
Me: WATCH OUT WE GOT A BADASS OVER HERE
lesliekn0pe: why didn’t my parents start training me to be an olympic athlete when i was like 3 okay my laziness is entirely their fault this all could have gone differently
Harry Styles was the 80,854,119,217th person to...
youm3at6: woahthere1d: we don’t stalk we support, they said we are not like beliebers, they said
numlits: vinny001: click play and watch the...
malfoymannor: why do olympians cry when they “only get silver” like jesus i don’t even go outside most days
up-all-night-cause-one-direction: WHY DOES ZAYN MALIK RUN LIKE THIS
why is there even a medal in gymnastics give them...
wekisstherain: Synchronized swimming? More like demon birthing 101.
Me watching the Olympics at age 8: Oh that's nice
Me watching the Olympics at age 12: Wow I hope we win
Me watching the Olympics at age 16: I'm going to fuck the entire swim team and no one can stop me
How I feel after using girl's shampoo
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averypottersenioryear: if drake and josh has taught me one thing, it’s that orange rhymes with doorhinge
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